crying without tears

i do not wan 2 hold it in but i have no way 2 let it out either. unable 2 sleep, i keep blaming myself. d worse part? even i... do not know what i truly wan. she is my best friend and all you could do is think about her make me feel even her. why her? i do admit she is more beautiful than me. but why? she already have a boyfriend, its not like she is single or anything. do you know how much it hurt me when you unable to sleep just thinking about her and to make matter worse, you message me to ask me about her? in your eyes, am i just a best friend? a buddy ? nothing more than a friend?

i am always by your side. i cheer you up when you are upset. i accompany you when you are lonely. but the minute you felt better i disappear from your sight.however to me, the minute i see your smile, every thing feel worth it. i hate this. its so unfair. i bet you are sleeping soundly thinking of her while I'm unable to sleep and end up blogging the night away. today i overhear a conversation between you and a friend of yours. she mention how you and i are single and keep on hanging out together and might end up being together. you without thinking a moment deny everything away. saying its impossible for us.

i hate you for saying that at least i wanted to hate you. the worse part of all is when i saw you i completely forgot about it. i felt useless and i hate myself for it. i am so frustrated. but you know what really takes the cake? its when you introduce me to your friend and try to be a matchmaker. i wanted to slap you. i really wanted to slap you. you juzt sitting there smiling away as if you are doing me a favour. trying to be a good buddy. at that moment everything look like blurred to me. all i could remember is i sat down and pretend nothing happen.

food tat my mum encourage me 2 eat

fyi, i nvr eat or tasted any of it

my mum's fren trying 1 of d scorpian stick 2 show me its taste lk chicken

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